"You Smell Like Mexico"

November fifteenth came all too quickly. I couldn't believe that three months had already come and gone, and I found myself sitting on the plane longing to be in two places at once. But I was zooming at five hundred miles an hour towards home, I was literally being thrown into America. Entering Chicago was the strangest feeling, everyone was white. Every sound, word, and letter was English. Every smell was so strong and overpowering- even though each one was familiar and known to me. The food was so different, it honestly tasted gross, even though I had been eating the same thing my whole life. I finally understood what a friend meant when he said "English when spoken feels like vomiting." After spending three months completely immersed in Spanish, English was just short of pleasant. Sitting in the Chicago airport for the two hour layover was probably the hardest part of the trip. I believe all of this is something called culture shock. It very much exists and is one of the most difficult things I have done in my life.

I arrived home at about 1:30 in the morning tired and worn, but stronger, and in my family's arms at last. My little sisters looked so big and grown up, just seeing them showed me how long I had really been gone. Up to this day (about 10 days later) it is still hard to be separated from my family in Mexico. Whenever I look at the clock, not only am I looking to see what time it is, but looking to see what everyone at the Ranch is doing. Are they just getting up? Are they singing the daily worship song all together? Are they stacked up on the slide listening to Julie read during recess? Are they counting up their points they earned that week to shop at their "store"? Is Mireya, Jorge, and Joel there? What are they doing? Adrian and Vero? Rosa? Being completely detached from the day to day life there is difficult. But it has surprised me how fast I have been able to return to my former routines and life in the States. Some things here have been really difficult to get used to again, but for the most part God has given me a smooth transition. I feel changed though. Not sure exactly how, but God did a lot in me while I was there. One of the first changes in me that my family noticed was a scent I brought home. My mom and little sisters continue to say "You smell like Mexico."

Pictures from my last futbol game

Pictures from our impromptu after-party 

 

The Power of God- Through Teaching and Through Friendships

I am beginning to understand that I am here to teach more than piano. Some lessons are so difficult. I think mainly because a few of the kids would rather be playing Wii, or playing outside rather than playing piano. This brings out bad attitudes. And when the students begins to pout, or doesn't even try to do what we are working on, no progress can be make. There is no use on forcing them to do it, because there is no want to learn. No one is going to learn anything unless they have a want to learn it, and they certainly are not going to retain it, unless there is a want. Now, a want doesn't have to be exactly a want to learn piano, it simply needs to be a want to accomplish a task that has been placed in front of them. A want to do what they're told (for none of them have the option to learn piano, by Julie, all of them take lessons), and a want to do something well- whether they like it or not. Life is full of these tasks. When the students begins to show disregard for piano, that's when I completely stop teaching piano. And that's when I start teaching whatever God lays on my heart in that second. It may be diligence, perseverance, work ethic, obedience, you name, I've probably covered it! I'll be honest, these lessons can be brutally painful. I think I've had a lesson go for close to an hour and a half which a normal lesson is 30 minutes. But! God has given me much patience! I thank and praise Him, whether my lessons are getting to the kids or not. I was almost going to type "and don't get me wrong, the good lessons far out weigh the bad." But than I thought about that, and it contradicts everything I just said. All of my lessons are good, and for the glory of God. Whether my student is playing beautiful minuets or just sitting and waiting for me to give in, I preserver and pray God would use even just one thing from that lesson to impact their lives.

Being a missionary here, and living 24/7 with two other missionary women, there is a bond that connects all three of us. Sometimes, a day will be just too much, not for any particular reason, and one of us will brake down. We can't explain it, we don't know if it was the hard class we had to teach, if it was feelings of homesickness, if it is the stress of having multiple things to accomplish everyday, if it was seeing all the brokenness on the side of the streets, it could even be joy or happiness we don't know. But everything just hits and collides at once. Creating unstoppable tears. And even when the weeping young woman of God doesn't understand, the other two still do. It's like, we are all here together, we can't explain what we are going through or what we are learning separately, but we still get each other. It's an understanding and friendship only God can give. Thank you Lord, for these missionary sisters.

This week, we were blessed to have two of Vicky's friends come and serve for a week. They both shared our room, so all five of us were a little cramped in here. But it gave us joyous times as we got to know each other by talking and laughing in the evenings. Laiza and Jackie spent their week here helping in the school, playing with the kids, teaching guitar lessons, and helping with chores. Then to top off the week, they prepared a theatrical with the kids! Friday night they preformed "Abraham." They made costumes, and entire set with curtains and props, a dialog and acting! It was so fun to watch the children, and I believe they had fun as well. Sadly, we had to say goodbye to our two knew friends today, as they had to return to their Seminary school here in Mexico. It was fun getting to know them, and Jackie gave me hope and encouragement of learning Spanish. She is originally from Mexico, but has lived in the States for two years, and so she has learned English. She speaks it so well! It gives me hope to someday speak Spanish they way she speaks English.

Here are some pictures of my Missionary Sisters and our two new friends! Enjoy!

 Vicky and I. Vicky is a seminary student that is completing her course by serving here for a year. She is such a blessing to have in my life. She only speaks Spanish, so that is a barrier for our friendship, but we find many other ways to communicate. And, I am getting better at speaking/understanding Spanish.

A picture from recess. Back row: Mireya, Mikayla, Angie, Caleb, Vicky. Front row: Ruth, Dani, Carolina, David. Mireya is our head teacher in the school. She is so sweet, I enjoy her friendship. She willingly helps me with Spanish, anytime she sees me studying, she will come over an help me, no matter what she was previously doing. She is Godly and wants to serve. Her and her son, Joel, come three times a week to teach school and Joel comes to attend school. On Fridays, her other son, Jorge, comes to study as well.

  

These were our two guests this week! Laiza and Jackie. I thoroughly enjoyed having them around and will greatly miss them.

Mikayla and I :)

Being a missionary is hard.

There are all these children looking up at me and observing my life every day, I'm trying to learn how to teach piano in Spanish, I'm trying to learn how to just speak Spanish, and keeping up on my own school studies. Missing my family and friends, and upholding friendships with everyone here. Cheese that tastes funny, clothes that always feel damp, and cold showers. And on top of all this, God is working quite diligently on my own heart and life.

But you know what?

If God hand picked me to serve here, then these are not complaints, but praises. If this is all that I have to "suffer" then so be it! God gives strength daily, so I don't have to be worried about being "able." Stephen was stoned, the Apostles (among many others) were executed, John Bunyan was sentenced to prison, John Elliot was speared, all this for something called the Gospel. And the whole time they were being persecuted, they were praising God that he thought them worthy to suffer such things.

"God doesn't call the equipped, he equips the called" ~Unknown

"If any man speak, let him speak as the oracles of God; if any man minister, let him do it as the ability which God giveth: that God in all things may be glorified through Jesus Christ, to whom be praise and dominion for ever and ever. Amen." 1 Peter 4:11

I'm finding out, that even though at times it is hard to serve here, all the little "sufferings" are completely worth it. Every time that I say the wrong thing in Spanish all the kids laugh and laugh, they think it's so funny. That's okay though because it allows me to laugh with them. God is good, and he takes care of his people.

"The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God: And if children, then heirs; heirs of God, and joint-heirs with Christ if so be that we suffer with him, that we may be also glorified together. For I reckon that the sufferings of the present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us." Romans 8:16-18

Sunbeam

I am back home. Hundreds of miles away, lays a piece of land that I now know. The people there are amazing, their stories, their hearts, and their families. Knowing that I may or may not go to this place again, is frightening. Two weeks ago I was thrown into a completely different lifestyle, new language, and new people. It was definitely culture shock, but it only took me a couple of hours to throw myself into Gods work that is taking place at Refuge Ranch. Saying adios and goodbye to everyone on Thursday was emotional and difficult for all of us. God's presence was definitely felt. God is the one who put the want in my heart two years ago, and He is the one that brought the plans, money, and safety on the trip. God was also the one taking me home. Home to serve others, grow in Him, and prepare again to depart. As soon as we were picked up from the airport, culture shock hit again. Harder. It is now Saturday afternoon, and I'm still trying to get used to my life here in the United States.

God taught me so many things while I was away. One being that everyday, God wants to use us. He wants our abilities, not only to serve others, but to truly glorify Him. Through love and words, He wants us to spread the gospel, everywhere. At home, at school, at play- a sunbeam for Him.

Blogging has become something I enjoy, and writing brings joy and relaxation to me. Several people have asked if I will continue my blog after my trip: yes, definitely. Please continue to check back here every once in a while and pray for me.

Sunday November 27 I will be presenting a slide show with more details of my trip. I invite all of you to come to my home Church and see all what the Lord is doing there at Refuge Ranch.

Questions, comments, concerns,

Complements, or good jokes, Facebook me ;)

Homeward bound

Just a few more hours, and I'll be homeward bound. It doesn't seem possible that 12 days has already gone by. These days here in Mexico were such a blessing to me as I worked, watched and played with the children. Seeing a new culture, land, and people for the first time really opened my eyes to the world around me. Wanting to spend every last minute here, this post will be short. But I wanted to let everyone know that I will be back tonight, and can't wait to see everyone!

When the sun gets to bother'n

Time seems to slow down when you take each minute, each second individually. Knowing that my time here is short, I've stopped looking at the clock and the calender. I've spent the past few days just playing with the children, trying to learn more of the language, and understanding the past of the lives here at Refuge Ranch. Two days ago, I went to the 'market' and it really showed the culture of Mexico. Miles of streets were lined with vendors, there were people everywhere. Anything from fresh fruit, clothing, and household items where being sold. Along with being the first time at a Mexico market, it was the first time I tried coconut juice! Oh there have been so many firsts in only five days it's almost unbelievable. Then that same day, Julie and Victor decided to take everyone to the movies! Yeah the entire movie was spoken in Spanish, but...I followed most it :) The theater was very similar to ours, except it, and most of other public places are completely open; no doors, just an arch to get in. In the actual movie room, its pretty much the same, only slightly smaller.
I heard it might be snowing back home... I hope not. The weather here has been gorgeous, except today, it rained. All day. Actually it's still raining. But on the bright side captured some cool pictures of it! Sorry I can't load any this time, I'll have to try to do it later.
All the ladies are leaving late tonight to drive there through the night, meaning tomorrow morning there will only be a few of us left to run the household. oh boy. But it think we'll manage.
It's strange, you would think there would be a millions things that I would find different than home. And yes, there are, but the very first thing I realized was that the sun is in a different position, and it even feels different. That brought the realization how far away from home I am. Trusting that God is always with me, and stays at home with you, brings me peace when the sun starts to bother me.